Tuesday, March 19, 2013

mountains and writing and beer.

Let's be honest for a second, when I'm not writing, I'm a fucking crazy person. And like, some people can be crazy in a good way and that's great and nice for them. I am not crazy in a good way, I am crazy in a maladaptive drunk way. Which is fine, but it's not an outlet. I need an outlet. Writing is my outlet and I essentially deserted it when I moved out here- like now that I have mountains to conquer, I don't need writing. 

But I do need writing. And I don't like thinking of walking up mountains as conquering them because it sounds really militant, and nature is a place to be calm and tranquil, so scratch the conquer part. 

The mountains are still great, by the way. They're great and I'm great and we're great together. But it took me a while to realize that I can have more than one thing that makes me feel happy. So basically, I can have mountains and writing, kind of like having two best friends. Also, beer is my third best friend, but i'm kind of trying to see less of them right now. We got really close when I moved out here, but it was kind of too much too fast for a while. 

I'm just saying it's time to transition out of permanent vacation mode back into I'm-an-adult-and-I-need-writing-to-feel-centered mode. I'm in fucking grad school, you guys. I need to be wearing turtle neck sweaters and thick glasses and drinking red wine. Okay, I already do that stuff. But seriously, I need to get my shit together and not risk seeing my clients out at the bar on a Wednesday. 

Ya dig? 

Plus I've been experiencing some really embarrassing things lately and I need the shadowy veil of the internet to make me feel safe sharing. Also, I deleted facebook as one of my new years resolutions so I'm obviously not spending enough time on the internet anymore. I'll tell you all about life without facebook, too. Because apparently even if I omit social networking from my life, i can never really stop talking about it, thus it kind of wins anyway. But whatever. I'm probably a less hateful person now. Or I just don't know where people I never talked to anyway went for spring break. Poor me. 

I missed you, internet. And writing. I'm giving you a cosmic hug. xo.