Thursday, July 12, 2012

my birthday present to myself. it was free. which doesn't mean i'm cheap... i don't think.

I'm turning 26 on Saturday, which is partially bullshit because I'm obviously immature and partially totally fine. Mostly I wonder if college kids look at me and think "Damn, that bitch is old." Because when I was in college, I totally thought 26 was old and that I'd have way more shit together when I got old. But it turns out I'm still substituting stolen peanut butter samples for entire meals in favor of buying booze, so I guess not.


Anyway, birthdays are honestly not that big of a deal to me. I more like that people make the effort to see me for once rather than me having to drive halfway across town to grab a couple of beers at some tool-ridden bar. But not too many beers because I have to be able to safely and legally drive home. In that sense, being an adult sucks because I don't live in a cool place in my city where I could walk or ride public transit anywhere. That's not the point. The point is it's my birthday, and I choose the bar. And I choose a fucking dive somewhere within walking distance of a place we can sleep. Because on my birthday I call the shots and I say we're all getting too drunk to drive home. Or I choose camping because drinking around a campfire and stumbling six feet to a tent after housing 4 hot dogs and 17 marsh mellows is my idea of the perfect evening. I know, I'm lucky to have friends, let alone a devoted boyfriend.

obviously my ideal situation.

Anyway, I know I said earlier that I thought I'd have a lot more figured out at 26, but in all reality I'm really not that disappointed with how things have shaken out so far. I'm good. I'm making strides and blazing a path for myself.  I got into grad school, I'm moving alone across the country, and I have more than 19 dollars in my back account. In my eyes, that last fact alone is cause enough for celebration. I'm letting myself do what I enjoy and say no to what I don't. Sometimes, I find, that's half the battle.

There are a number of things that I'd like to improve upon before I officially consider myself a grown up, but I'm mentally giving myself until I'm 30 and really old to accomplish most of them. At which point I'll probably give myself until 35... and we see what trend we're going on here. I never plan on actually recognizing myself as old. I plan to be infinitely forgiving of myself and stubbornly optimistic about my own future progress. And that's a promise.

I'd say that's a pretty decent gift to give one's self.

Happy birthday, Me. Cheers to, like good bourbon, getting better with age.


  1. Happy Birthday! You DO get better with age!

    As a fellow old(er) person approaching 30, I will say that you learn so much more about yourself in the next few years. Everyone says that, but until it happens, you don't realize. You'll be so much more sure of who you are and the decisions that you're making. You won't even apologize for'll be all, "I eat free peanut butter for breakfast BECAUSE THAT'S HOW I ROLL, SON!" :)

  2. Yeah the peanut butter thing isn't even sad - it's AWESOME. I mean ya gotta cut corners somewhere, right? How the hell else do ya think I'm going to be able to pay my credit card bills?!

    It sounds like you've done GREAT so far - so, mazel tov!


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  4. Happy birthday!!! I love "Because on my birthday I call the shots and I say we're all getting too drunk to drive home." Enjoy it!

  5. Happy Birthday. If you figure your life out by 30, please let me know how exactly you did it. ;)

  6. Thank you thank you for the birthday well wishes! I had a great day!