Tuesday, May 24, 2011

i was reeeeally loopy but now everything sucks.

I learned an important life lesson today. The hard way.


For the love of everything holy, Sara, don't think you're going to 'tough it out' and go back to work for a half day after a morning of major dental work and Novacaine shots. Or at least don't for one moment believe there won't be pain and suffering to the extreme.


When I left the dentist several hours ago now, I felt great. Half of my face was completely numb so I basically looked like I'd just suffered a stroke, but it was numb, so I was fine. In fact, on the phone with Manfriend after the appointment, I was what can probably only be described as 'downright giddy.'

I may have laughed hysterically for the majority of the conversation (at myself) and made statements like:


DRIVING ISN'T REAL!!!!!


...as I was clearly operating a motor vehicle.


I was also cursing like a sailor, which isn't really that out-of-character, but to be honest the things that I was saying absolutely were. We're talking weird shit, plus I couldn't make myself stop calling Manfriend "Man." He really doesn't like that.

What's even better is the fact that apparently Novacaine makes me loose-lipped literally AND figuratively, so I went ahead and had a little confessional moment about something that I'd managed to keep quiet for five long years. 

About peeing my pants in broad daylight as a sophomore in college.


That shit was buried deep. Like, EPICENTER deep. Thank goodness I've got a bangin' rack with magical powers, like the ability to cause amnesia. He'll never bring that up again if he wants to motor boat my shit.


Good times.


But alas, no more fun, loopy, confessional Sara. I'm no longer entertained by the fact that I can put on chapstick and not spread it around because I can't operate my lips properly.


Nope.


Now I'm actually in a great fucking deal of pain.


And stuck at the office. Away from anything to dull the ache. Except 200mg ibuprofen.



WHAT IS THE POINT OF 200mg?!!!!!!!!!!!!


g'day.

XO Sara

1 comment:

  1. I did LOLZ at this but I'm glad you made it to work in one piece. So glad I'm not the only one that physically can't put on chapstick when they're all hopped up on novacaine.

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